BAR CRAWL

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Yet another sousing station is set to fling open its doors in the increasingly tavern-laden land of Lefferts. A Flatbushed.com operative heard the whizz of chainsaws inside a  rather unassuming storefront at 703 Flatbush between Parkside and Winthrop last week and dipped her head inside. With Sinaloan standards blaring in the background, a group of men were in the process of fashioning what appeared to be a good old fashioned saloon. Here is the pictorial evidence…   It’s important to note that this is the first bar slated for what is generally considered the more obstreperous portion of PLG’s stretch of Flatbush.

GRAND THEFT AUTO XV: CLARKSON

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A Great Neck based developer (most PLG related property posts begin with that phrase) has purchased a pair of Clarkson Avenue single-family homes at Nostrand Ave. and plans to level them to make way for  a luxury 30-unit rental building, records show. You can absorb the Grand Theft Auto style rendering – slated to become a 2017 reality – in the title picture. Joseph Roubeni, principal at Astral Weeks development, purchased the two haggard properties at 191 and 195 Clarkson for a combined $2,425,000 last month and will soon erect a new structure that will feature a gym, balconies, and a roof deck.

DATELINE: FLATBUSH

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Pablum dictates that broke artists are always the fat part of the gentrification bat. But there’s another notoriously insolvent sector of the professional workforce that can be relied on to forage at the fringes for manageable rent – journalists. Prospect Lefferts Garden is no exception. With notebooks in hand and insufficient funds receipts in their wallet, Fourth Estate janissaries have rumbled across the Prospect Park plains en masse and planted their pens in the dirt. It’s safe to assume that one out of every three people bibbing next to you at one of the local boîtes works in some form of media. Here is a partial list of news

AISLE STYLE

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Supermarket taxonomy is an inexact science. We’ve all stood at the mouth of a seemingly infinite grocery store aisle, transfixed by the six or so organizational terms floating above us on a hanging sign. We stand there flummoxed, lost in slovenly calculation. What is a lentil? A bean? Is it lumped with the canned goods? An organic specialty? Hell, does it qualify for the “ethnic” section? After draining consideration, we either deem the aisle invalid and refresh the process elsewhere or step down a corridor of uncertainty with gnawing self-doubt. Management at the Associated on Flatbush between Hawthorne Street and Fenimore has clearly run into similar complications

SHELL GAMES

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The absentee owner of PLG’s most notorious eyesore at 1914 Bedford Avenue finally sold the property to a Queens developer last month for just $250,000, according to records. The bombed out husk at the corner of Fenimore Street has been a graffiti-covered, weed encircled shell for more than a decade and will either be refurbished or razed for redevelopment. If the Yellow King from True Detective ever decided to embrace his inner hipster, this is where he would live. Flatbushed.com took a few interior shots of the building where trash, triffids, liquor bottles and cackling ghosts conspire to unnerve. The home was one of several stately three-story structures that were

BIRDMAN

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You half expect Lamont Sanford’s red truck to pull up any minute to Ada’s Washer and Repair Shop on Rogers Avenue. The paint on the store’s sign has curled into near incoherence. Abandoned appliances and rusting sundries that may or may not be for sale stand sentry around the perimeter like dozing security guards. With its stacks of sick monitors, VCRs, CD players and televisions, Ada’s is an elegy to planned obsolescence. Tools are still put to use well past their reasonable retirement age like elderly McDonald’s workers.  It is a hospice for the electronic. The vintage disarray is  presided over by a Druid like man

PRAISE HIM

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As he’s done for the past half century, Rogers Avenue fixture Charles Clark spent his Sunday afternoon praising his lord and savior Jesus Christ. He’s convinced that those exertions paid dividends a few hours later. As he peacefully reclined in his living room amid Obama calendars and velvet wall maps of the Caribbean, a car jumped the curb outside his home, barreled through an iron fence and punctured the brick wall that separates his bedroom from the sidewalk. “I usually take a nap in there after church,” the shaken retiree told Flatbushed.com a few hours after the incident. “I just thank God I wasn’t in

SISTER CITIES

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It would be difficult to conceive of two more comically disparate locales than Long Island’s Sagaponack and Brooklyn’s Flatbush. The former is based on the divine conceit that residential perfection can be a reality – as long as it’s sufficiently funded. Bejeweled with oceanfront mansions and backyards that rival Nethermead, the Hamptons enclave usually qualifies as one of the most expensive zip codes in the nation. Flatbush, on the other hand, is a historically working class bastion that occasionally appears on lists of a less salubrious nature – some of them produced at 1 Police Plaza. It’s not perfection that’s sought here – it’s mitigation of

BIRDS OF PREY

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A Great Neck developer who was sued for deploying a fake FBI agent to intimidate an elderly Flatbush man into signing over his home has flipped a house at 259 Maple Street between Bedford and Rogers, Flatbushed has learned. Park Slope Associates picked up the PLG property for $500,000 in 2013 and sold it off last month for $1.4 million after a renovation, according to records. Roughly two weeks before that sale closed, The New York Post reported that a 66-year-old Flatbush man sued the same company for scheming to divest him of his property at 2319 Bedford Ave. between Albemarle and Tilden. According to the suit, Park Slope Associates sent

CORNER CATS

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Three men in front of the long defunct Erasmus Pharmacy at the corner of Bedford and Church Avenues in 1978. Here’s an ad for the business from 1930…     That corner, today.